
He remembered fondly his work at that time with Lord Woodpecker-Smythe who, though perhaps quite daft, was a jolly good analyst of such things and particularly good at kow-towing to the Empress' ministers. Woody had the ability to flatter and cajole even the most amphibian of personages.
Lord Turnips who had by this time had amassed enough credits to purchase 3 different offworld safari ships, had funded his own psionic institute, had countless sports teams and stadia and had his name on the trophy of 4 separate World-wide sports leagues was growing tired of waiting. He clearly had not bribed these ministers sufficiently or with enough style. It clearly wasn't a question of money. He could use Woody's grovelling powers now.
He sat in the visiting plutocrat office mulling over the potential for a hybrid asparagus/broccoli mixture when he received a call from his wife, Lady Turnips.
"Dearest, has though bribed enough of the lackey ministers to gain approval for my plans for Greater Lockgatia?"
Why, Kow-towing, is my spe-ceee-al-i-teee!
ReplyDeleteI believe my powers to cajole even the most amphibian of personalities may come in handy soon - I see it in the cards.
All about style points as you see. Turnips is just too direct and graceless to go in for flattery when it is clearly indicated here.
ReplyDeleteAh, wait
ReplyDeletePsionics Institute ... Bribery ... oh so very clever .. you must realize however that Psionics are only sought out by the criminal element
Fiddlesticks!
ReplyDelete