VOLUME III
I left my place of employment today at Navy Ideafaktori #17 and walked to the elevator. I was engaged in inane banter with a coworker who was also leaving. I believe we were talking about the price of tea in China, but I'll have to review my records to be sure.
Irregardlessly, we got on the elevator. As I was engaged in conversation, I paid no heed to the others who were also taking advantage of Mr. Otis' invention. The elevator reached floor "L" and everybody got out except me and two conversing gents behind me that, as I previously mentioned I was paying no heed to.
As we left floor "L," en route to my stop at "G2," I overhear one of the gentleman say "[blah-blah] [blah-blah-blah] we used to hand those out all the time when I was Governor." Governor.
Well, now I am in quite a quandry. My immediate impulse is to turn and gawk, but being that I'm the only other person in the elevator, this "Governor" would instantly know that I'm gawking at him, and I would be branded a rube and unsophisticate.
My only option at this point is to catch a fleeting glimpse when my target leaves the elevator at G1. Which I do, and catch a glimpse of former Virginia Governor Allen. Yes, that's right, I rode in an elevator with George Allen. That makes me cool, right?
Of course, on the drive home I thought of many clever things I could have said to him, "Hi Governor Macaca!" being the best one.
My impression of him: very tall man, snappy dresser.
VOLUME II
Lord Turnip and I were getting autographed copies of Blackhawk Down. As we presented our copies to Mark Bowden I asked him to write "Thanks for the advice" in my book, explaining that I could then make up any story I wanted when I told others about it. He was amused. I was cool. It erased the shame of my cowardice in VOLUME I.
VOLUME I
Ever since the end of the first Gulf War, I had vowed to Lord Turnip that, if I ever saw Wolf Blitzer in person, I would yell out "Loved you in the war!" Well, one day I finally DID see Mr. Blizter, leading a group of children across the street from me near the Capitol. I said nothing. The shame of it.
Andy,
ReplyDeleteI truly enjoy these 'slice of life' bits. Perhaps you should even have a special section for them titled - "Our brushes with Greatness"
We could even have a special section on elevator encounters - for example I ran into Rommel's son in an elevator in Deutschland. Funny, I said the same thing to him that you wanted yell to Wolfie B
W-S
I wish we could have folders where we could have sections with multiple entries. That would make inputting FFL articles a lot easier.
ReplyDeleteRommel's son? Very cool. That sounds like it'd make a good story. You could embellish it to make it even more fantastical too. You probably couldn't have said you were a big fan of his dad's though. "Love your dad's work." "The way he defeated the British at Gazala - awesome." Not politically correct.
My dad had a story about meeting Averell Harriman at Grand Central Station. Ambassador Harriman looked straight at him and said "get out of my way."
I love this thread. I'll come up with some "Turnipy" brushes with greatness of my own.
ReplyDeletePerhaps I'll speak on my encounters at 1600 Pennsylvannia Ave.
You could talk about the time you saw an intern flash her corset to President Garfield.
ReplyDeleteOr the 18 and a half minutes of wax recording cylinders that were missing from discussions Ezra Ayres Hayt had with the President on Indian Affairs.
Or the time you ran into Miss Sarah Bernhardt in the Map Room.
Ah yes, I do like the turn this is heading. It would be very easy to incorporate into the current storyline - I shall set to work on your suggestions!
ReplyDeleteYou guys are nuts. I mean that in a "good" way.
ReplyDelete