Saturday, December 20, 2008

Sinister doings in the Antipodes













Woody, Rossoroni,

Have examined the multi-spectral imagery that indicates that enormouse amounts of slag, phosphogypsum, and calcium sulfate wastewater has been removed from Mount Cook Mountain. (Since Lord Turnips is indeed a decendent of Captain James Cook, I shall refrain from using the slang Aoraki Mountain)


My analysis indicates with 60% certainty (+-30%) that someone or something is building a deep tunnel facility in the very stout volcanic rock. Could this "doomsday facility" be designed to survive some impending catastrophe? Perhaps I've already given away my analysis by calling it a "doomsday facility".


In any event...If they do complete the Mount Cook facility it could well mean that Karen and Ken are preparing for an impending global catastrophe or merely are collectors of calcium sulfate wastwater, slag and phosphogypsum.
Your, Turnips
(although not at liberty to reveal sources and methods, this image of a large industrial sewing machine or air filtration system being installed in the Mount Cook facility was recently acquired at great expense and loss of life...oops I just gave away a source and method)

4 comments:

  1. Why Turnips, you article was indeed cryptic but I do believe you are onto something. If those consarn Kiwi's ever get a hold of an Uber-Super-Sewing Machine then these fiends could hold the world's economic system hostage ... even CUTE WIDDLE BABIES!!!!!!

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  2. Could Lord Turnips cryptic references to Mount Cook/Aoraki be the same place as Lord Toronaga's Mountain Lair? It's widely known the Lord Turnips has travelled far and wide, perhaps one of the strange half-bestial cultures he has come across refers to it by these names.

    I sure hope the slag, phosphogypsum, and calcium sulfate wastewater (whatever the HECK that is - to paraphrase Mr. Binky) is not being prepared for OUR benefit. The would mean that there are TRAITORS on board the Planetary Sovereign!

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  3. Well, next time we run into Lord Torananga at the Travellers Club, I would mention to him casually that we are building a slag mountain and can't seem to find enough slag. See if he reacts.

    Or better yet...we could let slip to our crew (al la Captain James Cook) that slag is for "Officers only" and see if word gets back to Lord T.

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  4. Turnips and the Admiral,

    You two are too clever by half - by jove that is absolutely spot on!!

    Turnips, you try the 'old slag' gambit at the travellers club.

    I feel as story brewing.

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